Sunday, March 11, 2012

Swapping months may actually work..

 Growing up together is hard for a married couple.  We got married when I was 17 and Jay was 18.  Not only did we have to learn how to cook and clean basically as children, we also had to learn how to budget a small amount of money to keep a roof over our head and food in our mouths.  Jayson was born 4 1/2 months after we were married, so basically from day one we also have had children to worry about.  We have been married 26 years and have never been children free, or bill free.  Money has gotten tight again, for most people, it is just like starting over again as young kids.  We, like many other families have resorted to living paycheck to paycheck once again, and trying how to leave money in the bank for groceries, etc.  I once gave this burden to Jay because I was stressed out around 20 years ago, and as young as he was and being a guy, it didn't exactly go as I had planned, I had to take the reigns again.  Now that we are in our 40's, he has gone through the construction drop and the unemployment lines, he is as frugal as Hell and is working steadily again with as much overtime as possible, knowing it could stop again tomorrow.  Many times he would put his paycheck in the bank as I have and we would have no money left and he would say.."I just put my check in! How can we be broke!?"  As hard as it is to explain the expense of living, including a very active teenage daughter, I decided to start trading months with him and let him budget and pay bills, figure out allowances etc, every other month.  It's definitely working.  I am amazed at how he can pinch a penny, get bills paid and it has also made me aware of how much money I easily spend.  I get paid daily and have for 23 years so I always have cash coming in.  Having to hand it over to him nightly and ask for money for gas, Stevi's guitar lessons, her make-up, milk etc., has made me stay on a much tighter budget.  Last night we were able to buy the kids (Jayson and Guoda) dinner, as well as Stevi and Alyssa...something we haven't been able to do in a long time.  I know we can't do that weekly like my family traditions used to be.  Even when we were broke, my mom and dad found a way, even if we made it to Denny's.  Those Friday nights are missed by all of us.  I felt bad because I didn't know that Jay was going to pay for all of us... and Jayson and Guoda were upset that Grandma wasn't there.  The only reason I didn't invite her is because she hates driving in the dark and I know she is on a tight budget as well.  If I had known we had enough money, she would have been there I'm sure.  Our family has grown and it is hard to fit Friday night dinners into the budget, but we have been looking for a new place to live and the one we are turning an application in for tomorrow is big enough to entertain and I will definitely Implement family get togethers once a month as a pot luck if we can't afford to feed everybody.  For now, I am pretty impressed with Jay's ability to balance money.  Stevi is going to prom and needs to get her dress.  Guoda gave her two prom dresses to keep in the event she can't get the once she wants......Prom is expensive and Daddy is in charge.....Ought to be very interesting.....

1 comment:

A Mom Anonymous said...

Cash baby! That's what keeps us on our super tight budget. I never use the debit card except for gas. Everything else I spend is my cashed paycheck. I pay for groceries, household stuff like Target trips for toiletries etc, kid activities and whatever else I have anything left over for. FG's income pays the household bills which are cut and cut and cut as low as we can go. We live on surprisingly little money because we have to. We cook at home 99% of the time, pack our lunches, I make as much as I can from scratch (cheaper and better for us) and sometimes the kids just have to be asked, "Is that a necessity to survive or is it just something you want?" and we have all been denied the new outfit, expensive makeup, new golf clubs etc. because we are a family and we are all in this together.