Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Sometimes......it is hard.

I am only 40, but shit, I'm 40!  When you are young you take for granted the way you feel, are responded too, look.  I look in the mirror in the morning and I don't always like what I see, but most days I say "Oh well"  Some days I think.......who are you?  Where did all those wrinkles and spots come from?  And why do I have this damn "muffin top"  no matter what I do to work out or what I wear?  I  used to be able to walk into a room and command attention, Jay used to send me trolling to get us drink at concerts, all I had to do was walk through the crowd and smile at a guy and I would be back with drinks within about 15-20 minutes.  Can't do THAT anymore.  I think it is hard for all women to age.  My husband still tells me I am beautiful but I don't hear it from strangers much anymore.  Why does beauty have an age limit, and as women, why are we judged by what we look like?  It is so true that you can get just about anything and anywhere you want with your looks,  I guess we all have our time, but let me tell you, it is so hard sometimes when you realize you just don't look like you used to.  Sure there is plastic surgery, but I really don't want to look like Barry Manilow or Joan Rivers.  On most days, I just try to embrace my age.  Yesterday I went to the eye Doctor and I am now in bifocals, 2 years ago they put me in them also, but Dyna ate my new glasses and my old ones seemed to work fine, but lately not so much and apparently I can still wear my contacts but I need to buy readers to go with them.  I think I was not happy about the fact that I am actually at the age where bifocals are mandatory but when I bought the frames at a decent price of $154, (the first pair I chose apparently don't work with bifocals!) I was punched in the stomach at the prices of the lenses!  Ok, I need no-line........sorry call me vain but I am not going to walk around with the line across the bottom of my glasses!  And I am under lights all day so I need the no glare and then of course I work with hair, nail dust and bleach powder, so I need scratch resistant........I actually bargained with her and she got me down to the price of the no line bifocal lens at Eye Masters and after taxes, yeah that adds to it too I walked out of there at $508!  So much for the $154 price $325 for lenses?!  &^%%#@^&^*&(*#@!#$%%!  S      H        I        T  That's all I have to say!  Oh and did I mention...........I AM GETTING F$%@$% OLD!  Have a great day!


Mom said...

You still turn heads, dear. You'll always be beautiful. Grandma was still beautiful the day that she died. Let the soul shine through.

Chrissy and Jack said...

I am shocked that you think you look old. I would kill to look like you!!! Remember when you told people you were going to be a grandma? No one believed you because you are so hot! I'm sure people think Jack is your son when you two are out together. And eye glasses are always expensive no matter what age you are. Mine are for driving and cost over $300. So yeah, you're not old.